#98 - Dawn and Too Many Sitters

Timeline
Summer after their 6th repeat

Plot
Dawn and Jeff head to Stoneybrook to spend the summer. Right away the BSC learns about a trip to Hawaii, sponsored by the school, that will allow SMS students to go to $500. Non-SMS students can sign up on a waiting list.

They all decide they want to go, and they convince their parents to let them. Even Dawn’s mom, who just paid to fly her daughter home for the summer. The catch is they have to pay for half the trip themselves. They start babysitting like crazy and selling all their shit. Finally, a 4th of July carnival puts them over the top. They all get a spot, even Dawn.

The ten year old triplets and Jeff decide that they want to be Baby-Sitters and ask the girls if they can go in jobs and train. The BSC agrees, but it’s a disaster. The boys act like fucking immature morons and make the jobs harder for the girls. Finally the club decides to fire them, but the boys quit first.

Takeaways
When I saw this was a Dawn book I was so annoyed. Thank God she was in Stoneybrook almost the whole time.

Stacey says “what am I, chopped liver?” And Dawn explains that Stacey picked up that expression in New York...nope.

I can’t believe how immature the boys act on the sitting jobs and I don’t understand why this stupid arrangement didn’t get cancelled right away.

Also, Dawn continues to be the most selfish person alive. As soon as she gets to her moms she is begging to leave again.

On a side note, $500 for a trip to Hawaii, and that includes airfare and hotel? Nope.

Best Character
Kristy and Mallory, because even though they can’t go on the trip, they still help the girls raise money.

Worst Character
The boys for thinking they could be Baby-Sitters when they are still little jerky ten year old boys.

#88 - Farewell, Dawn

Timeline
Summer, after their 5th repeat

Plot
Dawn's friend Sunny's mom is sick, and Dawn can't stop thinking about going back to California to be with her. Plus she just wants to be there. So she tells her mom she wants to move their, permanently. Very quickly Dawn's mom makes it happen.
For some reason, Dawn tells Kristy before she tells MaryAnne. Kristy tells Claudia, who tells Stacey, who tells Robert, who tells Logan, who tells MaryAnne. Dawn can't believe how mad Mary Anne is. Then MaryAnne stops being mad and just starts being complacent towards Dawn, which is worse. Dawn makes some big fancy dinner to try to talk to her, and MaryAnne is like "Dude, I'm not going to spend the next two weeks saying goodbye to you. Just chill." So then Dawn gets it in her head that MaryAnne is planning a big grand gesture to say goodbye to her.

They throw a goodbye party for her, and somehow there are 20 people there, even though the BSC is pretty strict about not having outside friends. Dawn is waiting for the grand gesture, but of course it doesn't happen. Finally at home one night MA cries and tells her how much she will miss her.

The sub story is that James Hobart broke his leg and they decide to do a "Christmas in July" type event for him. They all go to his house and celebrate Christmas and give him little presents.

Takeaways
Dude, Dawn is the worst. Literally the worst. She's so selfish.

But I have to admit, I'm glad I don't have to listen to her shit anymore. I hope there aren't any "Dawn in California" books moving forward.

I love how realistic Mary Anne was in this book. It's exactly how I am when I know someone is leaving. I just cut them out right away. Like this girl at work put in her notice last week, and I have just been living my life like she is already gone.

Also, how stupid is Dawn for thinking MA was going to do some big grand gesture. That is not Mary Anne's style at all.

And WHY did Dawn tell Kristy first, who has the biggest mouth in the world?

Best Character
MaryAnne. She wins bc I love how she put Dawn in her place and barely cried in this book at all. Maybe she is sick of Dawn's bullshit too.

Worst Character
FUCKING DAWN. Goodbye, don't come back.

#84 - Dawn and the School Spirit War

Timeline
April of their 5th repeat

Plot
The SMS baseball team is doing really well and they have a big rivalry game coming up. SMS, and the school they will be playing, each do a "School Spirit Week" where each day has a theme. Some of them are worthwhile, like "Clean Up Your School Day" and some are pretty stupid, like Pajama Day. The babysitters are split on if they are happy about Spirit Week - Claudia, Kristy and Jessi are loving it, and Dawn, MaryAnne and Mallory hate it. Well, Dawn thinks some of it is cool, but some of it is ridic. MaryAnne wants to support Logan, who plays baseball, but she cannot stand the thought of wearing her pajamas in public.

On "Each Class Wears a Different Color Day" Dawn forgets to wear yellow. The news happens to be at the school that day and they show her and trash her for not being spirited. The other kids harass her and spray paint her locker. That's when Dawn decides she must end Spirit Month. She starts a petition, which leads to an all school meeting, which leads to an all community meeting, which leads to School Spirit Month getting cancelled.

After that, Dawn and MA realize that School Spirit Month was good in theory, but the harassing needs to stop. So they draft another proposal and get it started again.

There is also a boring subplot about the Barretts and the DeWitts all being cramped up in a too small house, so they decide to add an addition to the house and have a groundbreaking party for it.

Takeaways
Okay, seriously Spirit MONTH? What the fuck. Spirit Week would be enough.

The news covers this stupid thing, and after the community meeting the entire newspaper is about the events. SERIOUSLY. Nothing else is going on in Stoneybrook? And this is the MIDDLE school, it's not even the high school.

Kristy is a huge bitch in this book about the spirit stuff. I think that character has jumped the shark. She's pretty awful.

Also, of course Mallory hates spirit month, Mallory fucking hates everything.

Oh, and MA actually fucking cries like four different times about having to wear her pajamas to school.

Best Character
I would say Logan, because he just wants everyone to remember that this whole thing is supposed to be to show support to the baseball team, not to fight each other about wearing their pajamas to school.

Worst Character
Dawn and her constant need to have a crusade to fight against. MA for being a fucking baby and crying about Pajama Day. Mallory for being a fucking bitch about EVERYTHING. Kristy for being a psychopath and just being rude AF.

#77 - Dawn and Whitney, Friends Forever

Timeline
Summer time, after their fourth 8th grade year

Plot
Dawn is still in California and still babysitting with the We Love Kids Club, which has become more organized. They get a call from a dad who wants a babysitter for his 12 year old mentally handicapped daughter, Whitney. Whitney is pretty high functional, but still can't be left alone. They ask Dawn to pretend like she is just a friend coming over to hang out, to protect Whitney's feelings. She feels she is too old for a babysitter. Even though she is scared to cross the street by herself.

Everything works out well for awhile. Dawn takes Whitney over to meet her other babysitting charges, Clover and Daffodil, and Whitney is really good with them. But other people stare and judge Whitney pretty hard. Dawn is uncomfortable with how terrible people treat her, especially when one of her dad's girlfriends is absolutely terrible to her.

Oh, also, Dawn's dad is dating everyone in sight. He is trying to get over Carol, who he just broke off an engagement with. He makes Dawn and Jeff go on his second dates with him every time he meets a new girl.

Anyway, back to Whitney. She buys Dawn a best friend necklace and really truly believes they are just friends hanging out. But then one day they are together and Whitney wants to eat more ice cream, which her mom specifically told Dawn not to allow her to do. Whitney is a huge brat about it and finally Dawn is like "dude, I'm your babysitter, do what I say!" And Whitney is PISSED.

A few days later, Dawn is babysitting Clover and Daffodil and she runs inside to get them a drink and when she comes back, they are gone. She freaks the fuck out, calls the cops, organizes a search party...and she ends up finding them at a carnival with Whitney. She went to the yard and took them, thinking if she showed everyone what a good babysitter she was people would think she is a grown up. Also Carol is at the carnival and she comes up and hugs Dawn and says they Whitney did a really good job with the girls.

Dawn and Whitney make up and Dawn makes her an honorary member of the We Love Kids Club, meaning she can go on jobs with the girls.

Also, back in Stoneybrook Mrs. Barrett and Mr. DeWitt are getting married. The kids are pissed at first, and then they get over it.

Oh, and Dawn's dad and Carol get back together and get re-engaged.

Takeaways
At one point in this book, the ghost writer for Ann forgets it's a Dawn book and randomly Dawn starts speaking in the third person...."blah blah blah", Dawn said. It's highly annoying and lazy. Also there are editing errors everywhere that drove me crazy.

Dude, so much happened in this book.

First of all, were mentally challenged people really that discriminated against? Her dad's date who is awful to her is like a HUGE BITCH. She flat out says Whitney is disgusting and gross to look at. Do people really do that? Was that an 80's thing? I grew up in a town that had an entire campus for mentally handicapped people, so I guess I was just used to seeing them and it didn't bother me, ever. Why would it bother people? Maybe seeing me bothered them.

Anyway, that being said....Whitney freaking kidnaps two kids (who should have known better than to go with her, but that's another story). Why is 1. that just okay 2. it's just like accepted and no one ever tells Whitney that she kidnapped two kids and 3. it gets her A SPOT IN THE CLUB AS A CHILD CARETAKER.

Dawn's dad dates at least three different women in this book, and he always does the same thing - he makes Dawn and Jeff go with them on his second date. Why? A second date is really soon to be like "hey, I know we just met, but look at all this awesome baggage I'm bringing into our relationship," I mean, maybe it was his way of weeding people out quickly.


Best Character
Dawn. She tried really hard to keep it a secret from Whitney that she was being paid to hang out with her. And also, she could see that her dad really missed Carol and suggested he call her, even though she wasn't a huge fan of her.

Worst Character
I'm going with Whitney. 1. If she hadn't insisted on eating not one but TWO ice cream sandwiches, she never would have found out that Dawn was really her babysitter. 2. She is a kidnapper.

#72 - Dawn and the We Love Kids Club

Timeline
Winter, 4th repeat of 6th/8th grade

Plot
Dawn is in California, but she has finally figured out that California is a great place to visit, but when it's just your real life there are still the same issues and blahness that everyone deals with in real life. Nothing is bad, per say, but it's just normal. She clearly thought this was going to be just a six month "all about Dawn" visit, because she gets super pissy and annoyed that her dad's girlfriend (who she had already met, and she knew that her dad was serious about her) is always around taking the attention off of her.

Dawn has also jumped right back into babysitting with the We Love Kids Club, which is the California version of the BSC. It's very laid back, they don't have set meetings, they don't have a record book or officers. They get some local media attention from a newspaper, which leads into a segment on the local news, and then their business blows up. Dawn gets them to agree to be a little more organized, after they piss off a ton of clients and double book themselves on several jobs. Also, Dawn sends all the media pieces to the BSC, and Kristy gets all jealous bc her club is better and has never been on the news.

Dawn's dad proposes to Carol, who happily accepts, and Dawn loses her mind. She decides this must mean her dad doesn't need her around, so she STEALS HIS CREDIT CARD and books a flight back to Stoneybrook. She gets there, expecting all rainbows and sunshine, but her mom just sends her right back. Things are pretty tense after that, and then a huge fight between Dad and Carol leads to them calling off their relationship and the engagement.

Takeaways
The WLKC is disappointed they only got four minutes of coverage on the news. Um. Four minutes is an extremely long time for a news segment, especially on something that isn't even news.

Dude, I cannot believe the nerve of Dawn stealing a credit card and booking a flight. She justifies it by saying she is saving her dad money bc he would have to buy her a ticket later and she heard tickets get more expensive. Actually, Dawn, a last minute ticket for a same day ticket probably cost a billion dollars.

Plus, she had to take a cab to the airport which was one hour away. That cab right had to be a billion dollars.

Maybe I am just used to how the BSC runs, but the WLKC basically just sounds like four girls who like to babysit and get together every few weeks to talk about it.

Best Character
Dawn's mom. You know she wanted to just be like "of course you can stay here honey" but she was tough and treated Dawn like the spoiled brat that she is.

Worst Character
That spoiled brat Dawn.

#67 - Dawn's Big Move

Timeline
School has started yet again, so it's the beginning of the fourth 8th grade year.

Plot
School has started again, business is booming and Stoneybrook is having a huge community event that everyone is psyched for. However, Dawn cannot shake her depression that she has been hinting towards for several books now. She misses her dad, Jeff and California and wants to go home.

She blurts this out during a particularly fun and sweet family moment and completely kills the mood. But, relatively quickly, everyone just adjusts and before you know it, Dawn has a ticket for a six month trip back to California.

After that, Dawn starts struggling because it seems like everyone is fine with her leaving. Then she starts to really enjoy life and starts thinking she is crazy for wanting to leave. She goes back and forth for awhile, but eventually gets on the plane. Also, all the BSC members and all the kids they babysit for have a going away party for her.

While all of the back and forth is going on, everyone is preparing for Run for Your Money, a big community event against a neighboring town to raise money for charity. It is a huge event with a million events, and teams got to sign up for whatever they wanted. Each family has a team, and then the BSC has a team, of course. Stoneybrook ends up winning, obviously.

Takeaways
Stoneybrook has more community events than any town I've ever heard of. No one should ever bitch about being bored there, there is literally something going on every weekend.

I think Dawn is so so selfish with this whole six month trip. Like seriously. You are "so close" to your mom, but you can do this to her? Also, why not just go for like two weeks and get a California fix? Or wait for a school break like a normal person?

To be honest, this book was pretty dull. Dawn is sad, Dawn is excited, Dawn is sad again. Everyone is sad she is leaving, but kind of fine with it.

Also, MaryAnne doesn't really cry that much in this book, which is weird.

Best Character
I would say Dawn's mom is the best. It has to be killing her, but she's just like "okay, here's your ticket."

Worst Character
Dawn is pretty selfish, so we'll go with her.

#64 - Dawn's Family Feud

Timeline
I'm assuming it's still spring of their 3rd 8th grade year. They get a random four day weekend - maybe spring break?

Plot
Dawn's brother Jeff comes home for a visit, and the family has exactly one good day together before everything falls to shit. There are three days where the girls still have school, the mom has to work and so Richard takes the days off to hang out with Jeff. Richard (a grown male) and Jeff (a 10 year old spoiled child) have nothing in common, so they struggle. Then the family goes on a four day trip to Boston, and it's terrible. It's like they are taking two separate trips, because Dawn and Jeff basically refuse to hang out with MaryAnne and her dad. For some reason the parents go along with it, until they are like "no, fuck this, we are a family and we are doing things together today." So on the last day of vacation, they finally spend the day together.

Then they get home, and it's Jeff's last day in Stoneybrook (after he threw a fit and tried to demand to be sent back to California, to which his mom said no). The parents have hired a photographer to come over and take family pictures, and everyone is a dick about it. Finally the photographer shows them the terrible pictures where it is obvious everyone hates each other, and then everyone laughs and they make up.

The side story is that Mrs. Barrett (whose first name is Natalie, which I believe we just found out) is dating a new guy named Franklin DeWitt and they try to combine the families - the three Barrett kids and the four DeWitt kids. It doesn't go well until Shannon and Claudia babysit them all and make them realize how much more fun they can have if they just get along and play together.

Takeaways
Dawn is on a four day "vacation" and writes like 20 postcards to her friends - like multiple postcards to the same person. And they are all bitching about MA and Richard. Like 1. why do you need to write postcards when you will literally see the people within days and 2. why would you write to your mutual friends and bitch about MA? and 3. Why would she write to Kristy, of all people, and bitch about MaryAnne? Kristy is always going to side with MA, and she doesn't really like Dawn anyway.

Jeff is the worst in this book. He gets super pissed at his friends (the Pike triplets) because they play baseball and not soccer (soccer is so cool in California), he is rude to Richard, and he is awful to MA. Then when they are literally walking to the car to go to Boston, he decides he would rather go to Washington DC, and he is all "we have to go to Washington DC". He is a spoiled jerk.

In Boston, they basically separate and have two different vacations. What I don't understand is WHY did the parents deal with that? Why weren't they like no, we are going this, no questions asked. I can't imagine being on vacation as a kid and being like "nah, I don't feel like doing that" and my parents being like "Well, one of us better stay with her." My parents would have been like "don't care, come on." Like in this book, they are deciding where to go for dinner and they pick a place and then Jeff is like "nah, I don't feel like it, I just want room service" and his mom is like "well, I guess I'll take him back to the hotel". So stupid. He's fucking ten. You make him do things.

The Barrett's and DeWitt's plan a big family outing, and Mrs. Barrett HIRES A BABYSITTER to come along. Why?! You can't handle your own family, you need a babysitter to come while you are going to be there? So weird.

Best Character
Probably Shannon and Claudia, for figuring out how to make the DeWitt/Barrett kids get along.

Worst Character
The fucking spoiled rotten Jeff.

#57 - Dawn Saves the Planet

Timeline

Nothing is really mentioned so I’m just rolling with spring of their second 8th grade year. 

Plot

Dawn is taking a science class and they have an environmental/ecology section. They have a project due to just do something dealing with the environment. 

Okay, to put it bluntly, Dawn loses her goddamned mind. She goes way way overboard and starts lecturing everyone in the entire town about environmental issues. Her and Stacey work together on their project and decide to teach a bunch of neighborhood kids about the environment (I mean, of course their project had to do with kids). At the end of the class, they will do a “Green Fair” to show what the class did. 

Even though that’s the real project, Dawn decides to do another project where she puts together this huge proposal on why Stoneybrook Middle School should be the hub of recycling for the entire town. She has to submit the proposal to the school, where the student body votes if they want to do it and who should lead it. The students vote to do it, but they don’t vote for Dawn to run it because she’s been a giant c-u-next-Tuesday about the whole recycling bullshit. Dawn is hurt and basically does nothing after that. 

Her friends finally explode and tell her what a bitch she’s being. She realizes they are right and calms down. Her and Stacey finish their project and the Green Fair goes off perfectly. And after Dawn shows she is done being a psycho, she gets asked to co-manage the recycling project. 

Takeaways

I do not understand why the school had to vote on a town recycling center. It makes no sense. And since this class decided yes, every class for the rest of our lives has to run this recycling center?

I can’t even explain what a whore Dawn is about this environmental bullshit. Like she’s terrible. I would have stopped being her friend all together. 

When the Pike’s are being crazy while being babysat, they make everyone use real plates and real cloth napkins. But isn’t wasting water just as bad?

Best character

I don’t even know. Probably Stacey because, as Dawn’s partner for the project, she has to deal with her the most. 

Worst character

Fucking Dawn. 

#50 - Dawn’s Big Date

Timeline 

New Years Eve (yes, they skipped the entire holiday season), their 2nd 8th grade year

Plot

It’s New Years Eve and the girls have a slumber party. They all make resolutions, but Dawn makes a secret resolution to make herself more attractive to boys. Then MA tells her a few days later that Logan’s cousin Lewis, who Dawn has been penpals with for awhile, is coming to visit. Dawn decides to test some things out on Lewis. She changes her look, her attitude...everything. She kind of loses her mind. MA encourages the behavior and basically tells Dawn it’s time to change. Then Lewis comes and Dawn sucks, so he doesn’t like her. MA is still acting like a bitch so the girls fight. And the rest of the BSC is annoyed with Dawn acting like a psycho. 

Dawn really wants to use Lewis to figure out how to make boys like her, so she invites him over. About five minutes into the second date she realizes how much her new life sucks and confesses to Lewis that she was changing to impress him. He is like oh thank god, and Dawn changes her clothes and becomes herself again. And he and Dawn fall in love. 

Takeaways 

I think the copy of the book I have is my original from when I was a kid. It literally fell apart in my hands, and I read this book a lot growing up. I loved it. 

Dawn and MA get all these dating tips out of magazines. I remember reading them as a kid and tucking them away into my memory. Like compliment boys, say their names, have “you directed” conversations. 

Dawn is always portrayed as the “easy going, doesn’t care what people think, casual”type person, but almost every book proves that is not true. 

On their first date, Lewis and Dawn and MA and Logan go to see Gone With the Wind. It seriously sounds miserable to sit through that movie on a first date when you’re 13. MA picked it of course. When Dawn picks their second date they go bowling which sounds so much more fun. 

During the first date MA pinches Dawn every time she thinks she does something stupid. It’s so fucking rude. 

Best character

Lewis definitely wins. Dawn is a nutcase and a horrible date, but he still agrees to give her another shot and then tells her how great she was just the way she was. 

Worst character

Dawn and MaryAnne are pretty much tied for this one. 

#44 - Dawn and the Big Sleepover

Timeline: 

Winter/early spring of their second 8th grade year

Plot

All the kids in Stoneybrook have pen pals with a sister school. Dawn hears about it from the Pike’s and gets kind of jealous bc she wants one too. Then the pen pals’ school burns down and Dawn decides it’s up to her to organize a giant fundraiser, food/clothing drive and then, as a reward, give the kids a giant sleepover in the school. 

I realize this is lame, but that is literally all that happens in this book. The sleepover happens and it’s loud and annoying but probably kind of fun. And the kids were super pumped to help their friends. 

Takeaways

I feel like there has to be some kind of policy not allowing kids to spend the night in a school. 

Dawn is all worried about Kristy taking over the project and taking all the credit. That doesn’t happen. 

The kids start donating their parents stuff without asking. It’s kind of hilarious. The parents are way cooler about it than they should have been - they actually bought it back from them, rather than just taking it back. 

Best character

I mean, Dawn does something very selfless in this book for a bunch of kids thousands of miles away that she doesn’t even know. So Dawn. 

Worst character

Mrs. Rodowsky tells her boys they can have a yard sale but then hires Claudia to run it. Can the parents in Stoneybrook never do anything with their children???

#37 - Dawn and the Older Boy

Timeline: 
No time line was mentioned, so I assume it's near Fall of their 2nd 8th grade/6th grade year.

Plot:

The girls are having a slumber party at Kristy's house and when they go downstairs in the morning there is some dude named Travis having out with Kristy's brothers. He is the most magnificent human being Dawn has ever seen, and she becomes obsessed with him. It seems like just a little 13 year old girl crush on a 16 year old, until Travis randomly shows up at her house with a barrette set for her. Then he shows up at the middle school and takes her on an afternoon shopping adventure, where he buys her earrings.

Then Kristy mentions in a club meeting that Travis is dating a lifeguard and Dawn loses her shit. She sneaks over to the high school and follows him and his lifeguard girlfriend. She sees them kissing and loses her goddamned mind. So then she follows them again and actually talks to them, where she gets insulted by the girlfriend (she refers to her as a "little girl") and Dawn leaves, feeling defeated and embarrassed. She goes home, talks to her friends about it and decides she needs to actually break up with him. So she calls him and does that, and he's all like "I think you're blowing this out of proportion" and she's like "Bye Felicia".

Sub plot is that James Hobart is writing a play for him and his neighbors, the Perkins girls. When some bully kid in town, Zach, finds out about it, he makes fun of James and keeps convincing him to ditch the girls. James bends to Zach's will, and everyone is disappointed that he is being such a pussy. Then MaryAnne realizes Dawn acted the same way towards Travis and writes some cryptic message to her in the club notebook.

Also, at the very end of the book Dawn becomes penpals with Logan's cousin, Lewis. They are flirty and planning on going on a date when Lewis comes to Stoneybrook.

Takeaways:

There is so so so so so much wrong with this book. 

First of all, a three year age difference is not that big of a deal when you are an adult. When you are 13 and 16, that is NOT OKAY.  Travis is a CREEP. WHY IN THE WORLD would a 16 year old want to hang out with a 13 year old?

Travis reminds me so much of this dude I was hanging around with in my early 20's. He was always telling me how cool he is, how talented he is, how everyone loves him. He told me how to dress and things I needed to change about myself. I was exactly like Dawn and did whatever I could to please him. I was so obsessed with him! Luckily, like Dawn, I broke it off with him in a mature fashion (JK - I let it go on for years, ended up sleeping with him, was broken hearted when he started dating someone else, rekindled it a few years later and THEN decided to take charge and end it for real). 

When Jessi is babysitting for the Hobarts and is first introduced to the play, Dawn says she had "the best afternoon of her life". That is not saying much for the rest of Jessi's life. 

Best character: 
I'm going to go with Richard Spier, because he loses his mind when he finds out his 13 year old stepdaughter is hanging out with a 16 year old hot rodder.


Worst character:
Duh. Travis, the biggest creep in the world. 

#31 - Dawn's Wicked Stepsister

Timeline: 

AGAIN - No timeline. So it has to still be the end of May, their 8th grade year. Seriously, give us a timeline here ANN.

Plot:
Continuing from the last book, Dawn's mom and MaryAnne's dad literally just got married and the book starts exactly where the last one left off, with the bouquet toss. MaryAnne catches it, which just starts everything off on the wrong foot. I'm not sure why either of them felt like they should be the one to catch it, since they are 13, but each girl felt it was owed to them.

The families merge, and it is just a disaster, for real. The girls are bitchy with each other, but for some reason they still think it's a great idea to share a room. So they shove all their shit into one room, even though MaryAnne's dresser has to be in another room because it just won't fit. They fight and battle it out, and they are just SO rude to each other.

They have a family cleaning day, and Dawn is just a bitch - she switches Richard's organized sock drawer around, just to be a bitch. Everything comes to a head when the girls are doing homework in their room and fight over music being played. Richard sides with Dawn and Sharon sides with MaryAnne, and then MaryAnne stomps off to the guest room.

Dawn then decides to go really low, and she calls her brother Jeff for advice on how to trick MaryAnne into leaving her room without having to actually talk to her about it. They plot this seriously terrible idea to scare the shit out of her with the secret passage. It works, and MaryAnne moves into the spare room. Then the family has a coming to Jesus meeting and everyone agrees to work on getting along better.

Sub plot was that the entire Pike family gets sick or injured. 

Takeaways:
Dawn is TERRIBLE in this book. I don't like her at all, officially. Couldn't she have just been like "look - we know this isn't working, one of us should move to the spare room. But I want to stay in here because I love the secret passage, do you mind?" and MaryAnne would have said that's fine, and everything would have been fine.

MaryAnne is also very un-MaryAnne in this book, which makes me feel like Dawn was lying about it. Like MaryAnne calls Dawn fat and then makes fun of her for not having a boyfriend. It is just very uncharacteristic.

Richard makes Sharon bacon every single morning, even though she doesn't eat meat. Richard, why are you wasting that delicious bacon?

Mallory gets the chicken pox, and I know that is terrible and itchy, but she is so pouty/whiny and annoying.

Best character: 
When Dawn wants advice on MaryAnne, she goes to Kristy. And even though Kristy is jealous and hurt, she talks to her for quite awhile. Kristy wins this week.

Worst character:
Do I really need to say it? Fucking Dawn! 

#23 Dawn on the Coast

Timeline: Alright folks, this is where the timeline jumps off the fucking cliff and just starts swimming around, doing whatever the fuck it wants. Somehow, we have skipped winter time and all the holidays and we have landed at spring break of the girls 8th grade and 6th grade years.

Plot: The girls have two weeks off for spring break (TWO WEEKS?) and Dawn heads to California to spend time with her Dad and Jeff. Of course, she falls back in love with California and decides she might want to move back there. I mean, California has everything she wants: sunshine, her dad and Jeff, good food, and a copycat Baby-sitters Club (her friend Sunny has created a subpar version of her own BSC, called the We Love Kids Club). Dawn gets seriously annoying about this, and already tells Sunny that she may want to move back, and talks to her Dad and Jeff about it, so Jeff gets all excited. But then something happens, and all of a sudden she knows she has to go back to Stoneybrook. Oh I don't know, Dawn, like maybe the fact that you promised your mom you would come back? So Dawn goes back to Stoneybrook and tells her mom she was thinking the whole time she may want to stay there, but she didn't. The end.

Takeaways:
Even though they just dealt with Kristy being bossy in the last book, she seems to still have a problem with it in this book. Well, and every book until the end (I assume, I've never read the last books).

Dawn flips her shit because at the We Love Kids Club they serve apple slices instead of candy. Like, that's seriously one of her reasons for wanting to move back there.

Also, she loves how casual the meetings are, like they don't have offices or anything. Even though in the last book she was fighting to the death because she wanted a new office.

While she is in California, her friends send her post cards about their sitting jobs. Why? That's so lame. Plus, that means they wrote about their jobs in the club notebook, then turned around and wrote them again on a postcard.

I'm sorry, but one more time...who gets two weeks off for spring break in middle school?

Best character:
I think this week the winner is Mrs. Bruen, the housekeeper. Her breakfasts sound LEGIT.

Worst character:
You think I'm going to say Dawn because she gets all California obsessed and almost leaves her poor lonely mother alone is Stoneybrook...and you are right.

#15 - Little Miss Stoneybrook....and Dawn

Timeline:
Again, no real timeline. No holidays mentioned; no themed dances at school. Maybe this is how Ann kept these girls in 8th grade for over 100 books? There has to be a holiday working it's way in here sometime soon.

Plot:
Stoneybrook is hosting a Little Miss pageant, and it causes some ruffles in the BSC universe. Mrs. Pike asks Dawn to work with Margo and Claire, because she doesn't have the time I guess (? she's a stay at home mom for christssake). Dawn agrees, and then the other babysitters start to get all weird and want to prove how great they are too. Kristy basically manipulated Karen (her step-sister) to enter, MaryAnne convinces Mariah Perkins to enter, and Claudia flat our forces Charlotte Johannsen to enter even though she is so shy and timid and it's literally the worst idea in the world.

Mallory and Jessi do not participate because they feel pageants are stupid and pointless. And they think the girls are going to lose their minds, which they were pretty much spot on.

The babysitters work with their girls, and then on pageant day the only one who wins anything is Mariah, who wins a shopping spree at a toy store. The first place winner is a snotty little bitch named Sabrina.

Takeaways:
First runner up (Mariah) wins a toy store shopping spree. First place (Sabrina bitch) wins like a savings bond or some bullshit. What prize is better for a girl, ages 5-8?

It's so weird that this pageant was like, just for girls 5-8. It seems to me they would do a bigger event with actual age brackets to include more girls.

The baby-sitters get all weird and competitive while helping their girls, like Claudia and Charlotte sneak over to the Pike's to watch Dawn with Claire and Margo. It was rude and weird. And Dawn called her out on it, which was weird. The way these girls talk to each other sometimes is so bizarre. It's like they are best friends, but really they hate each other.

Best character:
I'm going to go with Dawn in this book. She is the only one who gets asked to help get girls ready for the pageant, the other three manipulate someone into participating. Also, Margo and Claire's talents are fucking ridiculous. Margo peels a banana with her feet, then recites a poem while eating it. Claire sings "I'm Popeye the sailor man" and dances. But Dawn is just like hey, whatever, it's your show, and just helps them be the best they can be.

Worst character:
Claudia is definitely the worst in this book. Charlotte really misses Stacey, so she has been asking for Claudia to baby-sit for her, I guess to feel closer to Stacey since they were best friends. So Charlotte, like, trust Claudia and wants her to be the new favorite baby-sitter, and Claudia completely takes the new relationship and destroys it by making Charlotte participate in the pageant. Like, during the talent part, Charlotte just walks on stage, looks at the crowd, freezes and fucking bolts. Not cool, Claudia. You should feel bad about yourself.

#9 - The Ghost at Dawn's House

Timeline: 
This book takes place as soon as the previous one ends. They have two weeks of summer left before 8th grade.

Plot:
This book is seriously so lame.

Dawn is obsessed with her old house, and she thinks there is a secret passage in it somewhere. She invites the club over and they search for one, and they end up sneaking around and scaring each other. They don't find one that day.

Then one day Dawn is reading in the barn and she falls through a hole in the floor. She is in a secret passage, which she follows and it leads to a door in her room. She finds a few things in the passage, and decides not to tell anyone.

Basically the rest of the book is her telling people about it, and then taking that person into the passage and they end up finding something that wasn't there before. Then Dawn reads an old book and decides the book was written about her house and it is proof that it is haunted.

Blah blah blah...some more people, some more scaring....then Dawn discovers that Nicky Pike has found the passage and he is the one who has been going in there. Dawn tells the club about it, they have a slumber party and they all sneak around and scare each other again.

Takeaways:
It took me forever to get through this book, and it took me even longer to work up the interest to write about it. Dawn is such a moron in this book. On the night she tells Jeff about the passage and they go through it, she seriously gets so freaked out she calls her mom home from a date. If I were Dawn's mom, I would tell her that she has no right to babysit children if she is scared of a fucking ghost.

They mention in this book a couple different times that Mallory is so amazing and she is probably going to make a great babysitter someday. Now, I get this is foreshadowing and all, and Mallory does end up being a baby-sitter, but now as an adult I am like...Mallory is 11. That is one year older than my nephew, and that kid can barely take care of himself, let alone babysit other humans.

At the end of the book the girls are talking about how they only have a few days left before school starts and they want to do all these things...bike ride, picnic, etc...but one of the items is "have a massive gossip fest"...who are they gossiping about? Each other? The kids they babysit?

Best character:
I'm going to go with Mallory, since she convinces her parents she is old enough to babysit even though she is barely out of diapers. Also, whenever she is babysitting her siblings with Dawn, Dawn is too obsessed with the secret passage to really babysit so Mallory has to do everything.

Worst character:
Obvi, I am not a huge fan of Dawn in this book. Also, her mother goes on a date and takes him to her PARENTS' house - which is where Dawn calls her and tells her to come home because you know - ghosts. So Dawn and her mom both share the worst character award for this book.

#5 Dawn and the Impossible Three

Plot:

Dawn is pretty new to town; she's from California. I tell you this right off the bat, because a good portion of this book is her bitching about the weather. We get it, Dawn. It is always beautiful and sunny in California, and Connecticut sucks. Get over it.

Anyway, so Dawn is the newest baby-sitter, and she is eager to be liked and please the BSC, especially Kristy, who is pretty butt hurt that Mary Anne has a new best friend. Dawn ends up taking on a new client, The Barrett's and she ends up seriously having to, like, mother these children. Mrs. Barrett, even though she is breathtakingly beautiful, is a disaster. Her house is seriously disgusting; her children are fucking filthy. So Dawn swoops in, cleans her house and mothers her children. The kids start calling her and showing up at her house, and then all hell breaks lose when Dawn is babysitting one day and Buddy goes missing. It ends up being his dad, who was pissed because Mrs. Barrett wasn't doing her part of the custody arrangement (shocked face), and so he sweeps by and takes Buddy to teach her a lesson. As soon as he figures out that Buddy was with a baby-sitter, he brings him back. But it was too late - Dawn called the cops and the entire town of Stoneybrook had dropped everything to search.

After that, Dawn talks to Mrs. Barrett and Mrs. B agrees to get her shit together. Also, Kristy and Dawn have a bonding moment in Dawn's barn, and Kristy names her the Official Alternate Officer of the club. The end.

Takeaways:

This book takes place around Memorial Day. Dawn's mom has a BBQ (which, like an hour before it's supposed to start she has no food for - so they have to go to the grocery store and buy EVERYTHING, even a grill. WTF Mrs. Schafer?!) Also, to note, the girls are in seventh grade, so I am guessing they are getting to the end of their seventh grade year.

At this BBQ, Dawn's mom and Mary Anne's dad are like, canoodling and acting all lovey dovey. This was pretty scandalous, because Dawn's parents hate him for not having money as a teenager.

When Dawn is trying to win Kristy over, she invites her to her house. Kristy agrees, and then asks if they can "play in the barn". It just seems weird that Kristy would call it "play" - hang out would be a better word I think? I just think baby-sitters are too old to be "playing" in a barn.

When Dawn first meets Buddy Barrett, he shoots her with a finger gun. She tells him she doesn't allow any kind of gun play while she is there. To this day, when I see little kids playing with any kind of guns, I think it is so weird and I think back to this book.


Best character:

Dawn's mom is my favorite character in this book, and let me tell you why - when Buddy is missing, everyone is searching and Dawn takes a moment to herself where she sits against the wall, puts her head down and starts crying. Dawn's mom shows up at that moment and is, like, so comforting to Dawn. It melted my heart.


Worst character:

I think Mrs. Barrett wins this one, because she is just the worse. She doesn't tell Dawn anything about her children; she never tells them where she is going, and she doesn't tell her that Marnie is allergic to chocolate so Dawn almost gives her some. Also, her house is a fucking pigsty, and I'm sorry, but that's just not okay. AND she has a babysitter, like, all the time. If you have full custody of your kids and their dad wants to see them, why not let them go with him once in awhile? Instead of hiring a baby sitter every other day?

Also, Mallory in this book is the worst. A bunch of the Babysitters and their charges are having a picnic, and they are playing this "Bzzz" game where you poke someone and say Bzzz....and I don't know what it really means. An insult of some sort. Anyway, at lunch, Mallory fucking Bzzzing one of her brothers - bitch, you are going to be in the BSC in a few books, you need to grow the eff up. Also, she is the one who stops Dawn before she gives Marnie chocolate. When Dawn is like "wtf Mallory, you'll get your brownie in a minute", Mallory gets all teary eyed. Again, grow the eff up, Mallory.